‘Hey, you there! We were just talking about you and here you are! Bari lambi umar hai, bhai.’
You do know that they were actually gossiping about you, right? In any case, a full-fledged Pakistani must have a very long life.
Here are some awful Pakistani superstitions that plague your life.
1. When your angry aunt yelled at you innumerable times, ‘Don’t walk over your baby cousin! She won’t grow taller.’
If you did walk over her, then you had to walk back. You don’t want your cousin to become a midget and suffer the family’s wrath, do you?
2. Do not play with the scissors or your parents will get divorced!
This one is the worst, isn’t it? Oh my! You have caused so many domestic problems.
3. When you are happily walking on the street and a black cat decides to cross your path
Bad luck alert.
4. When your right palm itches and everyone congratulates you for becoming a millionaire-to-be
What about the right eyelid, then? Does it only twitch because of stress and caffeine?
6. When maasi breaks your favorite cup and informs you happily that you have just avoided bad luck
Maasi dear, why don’t you break my whole dinner set in just one go?
7. When a crow makes an awful racket to warn you about the upcoming guests
Ammi is like, ‘Chalo, chalo, ghar saaf karo. Mehmaan arehe hai.’
8. When your cat is crying and someone throws a chappal at it
Of course, your cat is not in pain, it is a jinn. Just look at its eyes.
9. If you eat only one banana, you will have constipation. So you must eat two.
So if you have diarrhea and you eat one banana, are you cured?
10. Don’t say Pichal Peri. Just don’t. Don’t. DON’T.
But you had to say it. You are doomed.
